Sunday, December 5, 2010

Over Analyzed

Someone once told me "think before you act."  With time I have become an over analyzer.  I always think too much about every possible outcome to every situation.  I'm forever looking for the clearest point so I don't get hurt.  I think I need to just make choices and see where they take me.  Even when I think about things I never prepare myself for the actual outcome.  I usually end up hurt anyway.  So I waste time to not even prepare myself for what really happens.

I finally got what I've been waiting for.  My friends are looking to reconcile and I couldn't be happier but I feel like its too good to be true.  Like something is going to come and take it away.  I've already reconciled with my best straight friend, and I just wish he would connect with me more often.  Now my other friend who I hadn't talked to in 2 years, who is by far the closest friend I have ever had, wants to reconcile.  I just don't want him to change his mind.  I feel weary.  I don't feel like he wants to intentionally hurt me, I don't even think he has it in his mind to turn this but I feel like its just going to change the moment I get happy again.  Consider situation over analyzed and now I'm just gonna take the plunge.

No comments:

Post a Comment