Creativity

I long to be more creative.  I have a ton of creative ideas in my head but everytime I try to put them out there it never comes out how I want it to.  I feel like I don't have the money to obtain the necessary tools I need to create.  Recently I went to Chittenango Falls and took some pictures, but my camera is so inadequate that the pictures did not come out how I was hoping.  I decided to adjust some of them to make them a little more artistic but they fell a little short.  Here is what I came up with.

Those are the best of what I got.  I'm pretty proud of what I've done but feel like they could have been better.  I'm always trying to make the photos I take look better, but I always feel the same in the end.  If I do more it won't look good, but it could be better if I had more suitable equipment.

I've been told by numorous family members that my writing is good, but I feel like they don't get it.  Yes, my writing is good for blogger, but I dare not try to publish anything I write.  I feel like a small worm on a big hook.  My cousin tells me I need to get a little self-esteem.  Easier said than done.  I'm not just going to wake up one day and not feel like a loser.  I don't think years of disfunction just goes away, although if you know of a way please, let me know.